Sunday, January 10, 2010


As the negativity increases, the hurt decreases.

Over the years, I've developed a keen sense for bullshit. I try to be indifferent towards BS to seclude myself from stress and drama. I used to be the ultimate optimist, but I changed, over the course of dealing with the monotonous world of inane conundrums, better known as life. Oh damn, I sound so emo? Ha. Nah, I'm just an aggravated pessimist.

Shouldn't people be happy at the fact that they are important in someone else's life? If I was a chosen one, I would be ecstatic, just like Tiger Woods in a room-full of big-tittied blondies.

I hate it when I get turned away and neglected, especially by somebody who's important to me. I feel as if those people have failed me, which makes me feel as if i failed myself also. At the fact that I trusted them to be there for me…? Not going to happen again. I now realized that I can't depend on anybody. It sucks at the fact that the people who you thought will be there for you, just lets you down. Everybody needs somebody to lean on… but… eh.

I'm so sick of people's nonsensical, gratuitous, shit-filled lies. Shut the fuck up if you don't mean what the fuck you say. FEEL ME? But still, Everybody lies; nobody is perfect. I have to keep that mentality before I go loco.

Some people need to categorize their priorities and grasp what's important and what's not. I wish that somebody will put me as numero uno, but that chance is like zero to none. I sound depressed as hell; I'm not. I'm just not in a good mood. I don't know if it's because of my pituitary gland, or if it's because of some fucked up shit I encountered earlier.

By the way, I'm not complaining, it's just my bitching. EH, it's about 5:30 A. M., and I can't manage to sleep. My damn eyelids won't stay shut. Anywho, I shall return. =]

We all know that
actions speak
waayyyy louder
than words.

I just needed a hug.


  1. Yeah, I've been in your situation plenty of times. I've become numb to it but every once in a while I gain my youth and dependency and I get shut down again.

  2. Yeahh, I'm becoming used to it. It's not good, and I know it..

  3. Let the church say "amen!" Hey gurlie!!! :0)

  4. Its who you choose in this case you chose wrong.Us girls do that in many cases when we kind of blind ourselves.

  5. Yeahh, it's funny how most girls deal with stuff even if they know they deserve better.

  6. your being too dependent on ppl (especially the important ones). you get really vulnerable when you get to a certain point with people that you gain trust from and not knowing a person for what they really are and then you get urself caught up in all these feelings and emotions and it gets too much for sumone to handle. thats wen ppl tell lies because its all about how ur gonna take it afterwards.......i think u need to take the 1st half of 2010 to work on yourself and categorizing your own priorites and grasping whats important & whats not.

    this coming from a true friend. me.

  7. Ok, I'll DO IT! Consider yourself HUGGED! MUGGED HUGGED! 8-)

    This is Mista Jaycee just chiming in. I'm following you now, I hope that you will do the same.

    Now, it's true you can't count on anyone but fact is We have to. We are not made to be alone. So, the good part is that when you do find that person that truly digs you, superhyperunadulteratedjoyouschocolatydelicious
    Happiness but on the minus side it's like listening to Karoake with really bad singers when they ain't into you.

    How many Fellas have been into you that you couldn't or wouldn't recipiocate?


  8. This comment just made my day. =]

    And, I'm assuming your question was rhetorical, so I'm now answering it. Lol.

  9. Lovely blog!


Gracias for the input. =P

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