I believe that maturity comes from experiences, not from age. Teenagers usually have the tendency to have that know-it-all and the fuck-it attitude. Blame it on the puberty. BUT, some of them are just fucking ignorant and bored. I don't understand the point of starting rumors, or lying just for the fuck of it.
Anywho, I'm going to use letters as a replacement for their names, you know, like variables. I'm not the type of person to use anybody's name for my own benefit, nor anybody else's.
As you all know, I'm happily taken. I hardly go out because I respect Bf's requests. I have changed my ways; not saint-like, but somewhat more stable.
So, one day, A hit me up and told me that B was talking straight caca about me. A told me to watch out because B is being fake, like a Barbie. (YES, there was an implication.) B supposedly told A that I was trying to get with some dude, or some shit. I find that extremely amusing. The dude that B was talking about grabbed my phone off of my hand and called his phone to get my number. I had no intentions of giving him my number, nor will I ever have any. I don't understand what B's shenanigans were all about, so I confronted B, and B claimed that B's mouth was shut. I just nodded, and walked away. A told me that it's funny because B supposedly lied to my face.
An instance like this is just an evidence of naiveness from a typical, teenage drama. Honestly, I do not give a flying-fuck about the whole she-said-he-said shit. I confronted B to show B that I acknowledged B's disease of the diarrhea of the mouth, and it seems to be spreading. Regardless if it was real or not, I would most likely believe what I want to believe. It came to it's demise anyways.
I have been there, and done that. It's not worth it to act like savages because of a lie. I am indifferent to all this inanity. Also, I understand and try to figure out people's normality from their actions and vernacular. I'm not saying that I have a Ph.D., but it's just common sense. Basically, I can tell if they're fibbing. I learned that being observant is one of the cures for bullshit.
Lo siento for the M.I.A.-ness. I've been busy with school and such. I promise, when I get my shit together, there will be some award-winning literature up in this bitch. Lol. JK. But, there will be remarkable stuff that's worth reading. =]
Meanwhile, go through my archives and read some of my previous posts.
People assume that I am some cocky, illiterate bitch who thinks that the world orbits her. HAHAHA, fuck outta here. I'm one of those pariahs, who hides in the bathroom when lunch time comes around. Just kidding. I'm an educated female who doesn't accept her body for how the Creator made it. I should be happy, right? I find too many flaws, but I am happy at the fact that all 23 pairs of my chromosomes are present and normal.
I have confidence, but I'm insecure. Haha. Regardless at the contradiction, that's who I am.
I never considered myself as pretty. Why? People look better than me, and I look better than people; monkey in the middle. When I take a gander at my pictures, I don't believe that she's me most of the time. I hardly look at mirrors, at the fact that I am not a girly-girl, and looking at myself makes me reminisce about unnecessary bullshit.
ANYWHO, my friends would usually hear me complain about how I'm gaining weight. It's one of my many obnoxious insecurities. I dislike my: nose, ears, stomach, butt, knees, thighs, legs, feet, and toes.
Let me tell you this undeniable shit. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT try to fix something that is not broken! For example: Bf hates feet, like he literally despise them. My dumbass always look at my feet like there's something wrong with them, but they were fine. One day, I tried to make it 'better', and now there is something wrong with my toe. It's fucking disgusting. It looks like Mr. and Mrs. Alien copulated and laid an egg on it.
I haven't told him. I wonder what the fuck he would do if he finds out. He always tells me that he can't have a girl with nasty feet, or if there's just something wrong with them. I don't know what I'm going to do if that shit doesn't come out. I started crying yesterday, like a dumb bitch, because I was so frustrated. Momma was like, "Haitians are worrying about food, water, and some place to sleep, and you're worrying about your damn toe?" Even if I recognized the fact that I'm more fortunate than others, I resisted to be quiet and kept on whining. Momma said it'll come out eventually. Also, she got lost in some trance; she started ranting on about how when she was little, she had all these shit on her skin, but it eventually came off.
I don't give a fuck, even if it is flying. I'm so mad. If this nasty alien-baby does not disappear in a week or two before Valentines Day, I'm going to a podiatrist and getting that shit aborted. Fuck that.
Let me tell you something! Church people are a bunch of damn hypocrites, well, most of them. As Bf mentioned, people who have a rank in their religion's hierarchy think that they can boss anybody around.
So last night, I went to my friend's gathering for her church. First of all, her family does not like me; they think that I'm a bad influence to her. To keep a long story short, my name was mentioned in some inane situation, and I got bullshit for it. Anywho, so I thought it was going to be cool to hang out and meet new people. I mean like, church folks, right? Niceness all over the damn place! Yeah, ok. Not at all. We went somewhere to get some pizza and by the time we got back to the place, some lady started runnin' her mouth. Supposedly, the most positive lady was yelling at her because I was with her. ARE YOU FUCKIN' SHITTING ME? For crying out loud, she's fuckin' 18 years old. I believe that she knows what's right and what's wrong. Nobody is perfect, and everybody makes mistakes. Church people are not suppose to be all fuckin' uptight and shit, so I thought. I always knew that church people are the nicest, and most accepting kind of people there is, but I just changed my mind. Fuck outta here.
So, she started telling the lady that the reason I was there was so people can pray for me, or some shit like that. WTF? Are there horns and a tail growing on me? That shit is not cool. I don't like the fact that she made me sound like some dying prostitute on the corner who is in need of God in her life. Just kidding, but I sure felt like some worthless, chewed-up, piece of shit. Her parents wanted a restraining order on me. Like damn... Am I really that bad of a person?
That deserved the Stank Face.
I'm not that religious. I go to church at times, and I pray, but this kind of situation makes me want to be a damn Atheist. People need to believe in something to keep their sanity, but some church congregations are cult-like. SMFH. Sure can't blame everything on the a-a-a-aaalcohol, but you can blame everything and anything on religion.
Some pictures from last night/this morning. I got it off of my friends Facebook. Lol.
Over the years, I've developed a keen sense for bullshit. I try to be indifferent towards BS to seclude myself from stress and drama. I used to be the ultimate optimist, but I changed, over the course of dealing with the monotonous world of inane conundrums, better known as life. Oh damn, I sound so emo? Ha. Nah, I'm just an aggravated pessimist.
Shouldn't people be happy at the fact that they are important in someone else's life? If I was a chosen one, I would be ecstatic, just like Tiger Woods in a room-full of big-tittied blondies.
I hate it when I get turned away and neglected, especially by somebody who's important to me. I feel as if those people have failed me, which makes me feel as if i failed myself also. At the fact that I trusted them to be there for me…? Not going to happen again. I now realized that I can't depend on anybody. It sucks at the fact that the people who you thought will be there for you, just lets you down. Everybody needs somebody to lean on… but… eh.
I'm so sick of people's nonsensical, gratuitous, shit-filled lies. Shut the fuck up if you don't mean what the fuck you say. FEEL ME? But still, Everybody lies; nobody is perfect. I have to keep that mentality before I go loco.
Some people need to categorize their priorities and grasp what's important and what's not. I wish that somebody will put me as numero uno, but that chance is like zero to none. I sound depressed as hell; I'm not. I'm just not in a good mood. I don't know if it's because of my pituitary gland, or if it's because of some fucked up shit I encountered earlier.
By the way, I'm not complaining, it's just my bitching. EH, it's about 5:30 A. M., and I can't manage to sleep. My damn eyelids won't stay shut. Anywho, I shall return. =]
We all know that actions speak waayyyy louder than words.
So, people always ask why my name is 'SNEAkUHbUTT'. It means that I like sneakers and badonkadonks. HAHAHA. Wondering why it's not sneakERbutt? When I was in middle school, I thought it was cool to misspell words on purpose. I just never changed it.
Anywho, I used to be OBSESSED with sneakers. I used to get about 4 or 5 pairs a month for no reason. Since January 2009, I started slowing down with the purchases, mainly because I had no job, and the fact that I was just getting sick of it. Summer of 2009, I hardly wore sneakers. I wore the same pair of gladiators my mom got me. Lol. The main reason why I started wearing those sandals is because I didn't want to get the sock tan line. Lol. I ended up loving them anyways. Sneakers are cool, to a certain extent. I used to spend about $100 for a pair. SHIT!! I can get 2 pairs of nice boots for that amount of money. I'm not a ball player, so I don't see the necessity of having over a hundred pairs.
Bf also told me that sneakers are not feminine; he's correct. I'm tired of looking like I'm about to play ball everywhere I go. My mom told me that my style will change eventually, and it did.
BUT, sneakers made me unique, back when nobody was all up on JB's ass. SMH to the hypebeasts; no offense. Also, I used to rock kicks a lot because I noticed that guys appreciated/noticed it/me more. Lol. I was going through puberty... Shit. ALL I wanted was attention, but now, I could really care less. I wear what I want, and what's comfortable. Go UGGS!!!! Yeah, sneakers make people's feet look nasty.
Take a look at some of the kicks. I would take a group picture of all my sneakers, but it's too difficult to put them all back in their boxes. Also, JordanDepot had a little segment about SNEAkUHbUTT.
Now, I constantly wear the same pair of black boots. Lol.
HEYYYYY! Take a look at what I saw the other day...
It tried to hop over the fence, but poor Bambi got caught.
I had to take care of Him. He drank a little too much. Yeah, one too many shots... SMH. And so, He said that He'll never drink again... NEVER say never. Lol. I extremely slowed down on alcohol though. I don't need my liver failing by the time I turn 21.
Cheetah girls! =p Miriam is back from college.
Anywho, I'm not really in a mood to type up some of my epiphanies. Haha. Uh, I gained weight, so I'm overweight for my height. It sucks. =/ I really need to find a job though. I've applied for about 4 or 5 and none of them called me back. I feel worthless at the fact the that Mc Donald's didn't even hire me. SMH!!! Momma said it wasn't worth it. I'm applying at Applebee's and Weis later today, hopefully. I feel like a straight bum, and I hate it. I go to school around 7:20 a.m., be back home before 12 p.m, and I would not do anything after. I barely get homework. I NEED something to do. It's too cold to run outside. Getting a job is the perfect solution.
To the persons who know me, they know damn well that my room is a pigsty. HAHAHA. I've been trying to clean it since forever. When I do clean it, it only stays like that for two or three days. Geez. I feel as if I have all the time in the world, but I find it bizarre at the fact that I really have not achieved anything. =/
YES, I know today is January 2nd, but I don't give a fuck. Lol. It's better late than never. =]
Last photo of 2009.
So, this was the first time I spent my New Year's eve without my family; my friends and I went out instead. They had to follow my car to the destination since we had the GPS. Uh, that wasn't such a good idea, especially at the fact that it was sleeting out. Supposedly, I'm a crazy driver. I don't think so. Lol. All in all, it was fun, even if we didn't see the ball drop because there wasn't any T.V. in the house. Lol. Go figure. I don't have any pictures. I didn't want my camera stolen, lost, broken, or etc.
I have these pics though. I had to pull out my camera for this dude. I know that it's fucked up, but shit, it's a new year. Lol. I needed a reminder, but to whoever left him in front of the door, shame on you!
First photos of 2010.
I don't understand why people get fucked up during the year's demise. I always wondered why, and where all these drunk-and-high-ness-es came about. Believe it or not, I never gotten drunk during any New Year's Eve. As I said before, I was always with the fambam.
At the party that my friends and I went to, I drank a little, but not white-boy-wasted because I was a designated driver. AND, I was not planning to get trashed anyways. I just didn't want to feel like a lame just watching people down liquor. Lol. Geez.
Anywho, I cannot wait for the surprises this new year got in stock for me. As of right now, the start of my year has been going well. =]
EDIT: Btw, the highlight of my New Year's shebang-bang was when this dude at Dunkin' Donuts tried to spit game at me. LOL. Funniest shit! Tell me why this dude had a heavy Indian accent (sounded like the Indian guys from 40-Year-Old Virgin, but wayyyyy heavier lol), and he was just talking mad shit. I think this dude was doing hookah before he went to work. My friend and I went through the drive-thru, and the person manning it couldn't stop saying hello. Lol. Dude was probably high out his ass. HAHA. It was about 3 am, and the dude was like, "I like you, you should come in, and stay..." Blah blah. Lol. I couldn't stop laughin'. I should've taken a video. Lol.