Tuesday, March 24, 2009


Here is:
Something real.
Something true.
A girl's life...

There's this girl I know. We knew each other for almost our entire lives. We keep in touch from now and then, but it's difficult because she moved so far away.

Well, I spoke to her recently, and some things came up.. I am not going to release her name because what I'm about to tell you is extremely personal. It can also help other people to realize a lot of things, especially all the ladies out there.

I did ask for her approval, and she agreed as long as I kept it anonymous.

So, like I did in one of my previous posts, 'The End of the Road?', I will give her a pseudonym.
Let us call her Patricia.

.. Let me tell you, Patricia is one hell of a person. Believe it or not, she is crazier than I am. HAHA. She's amazing. She is gorgeous and smart. She basically has the whole package. Her personality is unbelievable. She is one in a billion.

People are jealous of her, not only because of her looks, but her entirety. She doesn't seem to see that beauty.

It all began back when she was thirteen years old, she was 'taken advantage' of by this guy who was years older than her. We shall call him Abc. (Uhh yea.. That's the best nonsensical name I can come up with.) Abc was not an ordinary guy. They knew each other for quite some time. Also, his sister is one of her best friends.

Basically, Abc got her drunk, and 'took advantage' of her. She didn't say 'rape', but the way she described it to me, it was. When she got older and more knowledgeable, she realized that it was in fact 'rape'. She was horrified, disgusted, and ashamed. She didn't know what to do, but to blame it on herself. (For years, I've been telling her that it was not her fault, but she still believes that it was.) 'Til this day, she doesn't even think that Abc knows what he did to her, and how much impact he had on her life. He took something priceless, something that can never be replaced. He took away her innocence.

By the time she turned seventeen, there were about three more instances that took place that altered her life, her world, her everything. She put herself in positions that she cannot get herself out of. She got taken advantage of, and was raped again. She doesn't consider herself being decent. She is disgusted and humiliated by all the shit that happened to her. She can't even look at herself in a mirror. She doesn't see what others see. She sees somebody who is worthless. Now, she is numb to everything. She tend to not give a fuck anymore. She could barely cry about situations like that. (Yea, not like in TV shows or movies. She did cry a couple of times, but she was not hypersensitive towards it.) Plus, all of these instances happened while she was highly intoxicated. Her memory was a blur.

She asked me why all these bullshit tend to happen to her all the fucking time. She asked me why people won't just leave her alone. She asked me why God had forsaken her.
- I was silent. I had not a damn thing to fucking say. I wish I could give her a hug, but she is too damn fucking far.

I can understand why she would be blaming herself.
But come on!! She was drunk, had no control. She did say 'NO' and 'STOP'. She even kicked the guy off of her, but it still happened. She wasn't strong enough.

Yes, I do understand that things happen for a reason, but she did not deserve all of that. She's a good person.

I don't blame her. I can never. It was not her fault that there are assholes out there who would do inhumane bullshit like that. Some people are just fucking disgusting, and have no morals. She just needs to choose a set of friends who would take good care of her. I am one of those people who care a lot for her, but I'm too far away to give my shoulder to cry on.

I'm here for you, Patricia.
I love you pretty mama.

For all the ladies out there who had similar experiences like my dear friend, you are not alone. Don't think that this only happened to you. Find someone to talk to. Just let it all out. You don't need any shit holding you back. Cherish your life no matter what. What don't kill you, makes you stronger.

Baked Mussels
(by Mikki, and they were bangin'!)


  1. wow... believe it or not I also knew a girl who went through that. Very painful experience.

  2. Yes.

    Too many fucking assholes in this world.


Gracias for the input. =P

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