Thursday, September 24, 2009

"It's up to you..

Always has, always will be.."

Peep the tan lines. =p


I'm keeping this post short and simple. Well, I'm going to try to. =]

Let me fill you in onto Mikki's current love life. Lol. I'm technically taken, but literally single.

Basically, Boyboy and I were conversing, and shit came up. I got to admit that I've been through some stuff that I'm not proud of. Yes, and half of them were instigated by me. Eh, I told him the things he needed to know. No need to flaunt what's unnecessary.

I don't force people to stay with me if/when they find some level of uncomfortableness. I understand that I have done things that can be described by being repugnant and obscene. I've done unbelievable shit that can be classified as grotesque. I changed, but it's still me. It's hard to explain, but hopefully you understand where I'm coming from. `Til this day, I can't fathom why I've done the shit that I've done. I have no choice but to take it all in. I caused this to myself, and I shouldn't blame anybody for it; of course, I don't.

A couple of months back, I met somebody who made me realize that I was a fuck-up. He made me grasp that it was not okay to be the person I was. It was not okay to not give a fuck. Actually, he wasn't the first one. He was just the one who made an impact. As uncanny as it might seem, I actually listened. Regardless from all the indifference in the world, it's in human nature to care. Even if I do well in school, my reputation outside does matter. I am a reflection of anybody who I am around with, and vice versa.

So yesterday, the past went back to the present. REWIND!

He was penalizing me for something that happened about a year and a half ago. I understand where he was coming from, so I told him that it was his choice to stay or leave. I was not going to force him to keep dealing with it. He has a choice to walk away from the problem; I don't, and never will. He doesn't have to deal with me, and everything that comes in the package.

I'm assuming that he chose to deal with all of my bullshit, but I think that his stay will just be ephemeral. Nobody lasts with me. Lol. But, it would be the best if it works out, wouldn't it be? =]

I surprised myself because I developed patience. HAHA. I'm waiting for a couple of more weeks, or months. I want to see where this goes. =]

PostScript:

One example that changed was the drinking. If you truly knew who I was, you would know that I carried a bottle with me everywhere and anywhere I went. I usually stashed two bottles in my room, incase I finish one of them. Now, I don't carry shit anymore, and no more liquor en mi cuarto.

Yessss, Henny and I broke up.
PostPostScript:

He doesn't drink, nor smoke. Ironically, I met him at the movie theaters while I was drinking liquor from a Monster can. HAHA.

8 comments:

  1. hii mamaz. so hmm i always read this, becuz i hav nothing better to do. and i love readin some of these because i jst think about wen wed be on tha fone or sumthin and ud explain the hole thing to me.so it makes me laugh. about guys, i cldnt giv yu anymore advice on tht becuz i think iv h=gave yu all the sane advice i possibly can. & anywaay yur usually the one giving me all the advice. and i guess jst becuz wats his name *coughcough* gave off the asshole vibe,i dnt kno him to judge him. so wel see. lol
    and uhm
    SO EVERYONE KNOWS THIS GIRL IS AMAZING.I TELL HER *EVERYTHING* I CRY TO HER ALL THE TIME. SHES DEF ONE OF MY BESTFRIENDS.AND SHE KNOWS I GOT HER THRU IT ALL.

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  2. Your boobs are amazing.

    The end. =]

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  3. oooh this sounds all too familiar. i'm obsessed that tatt on the back of your neck btw - it looks like it's your name. idk but that shit is hot!

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  4. =p

    Thanks, and yes, it is my name. =]

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  5. Thanks a lot for the compliment, Mikki. Lol. Your entries are pretty damn insightful, too.

    Keep writing and I'll keep reading.

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Gracias for the input. =P

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