Tuesday, December 15, 2009

"Whatever Will Be, Will Be . . ."

This is my blog, damn it,
and I'm going to write whatever the fuck I want.

I'm enraged,
disappointed,
bewildered,
frustrated,
as fuck.

Have you ever been in a predicament that has no way out? Like, trapped in some disfigured cage that was rejected from a factory; no doors.

I don't like the situation that I am in at the moment. How foolish am I? Really? My time-will-tell philosophy is about to smack me in the face with a big, fat F for failure.

Having feelings for somebody, but that somebody is not feeling the same way...? Come on. WhatTHEEfuck?! Human nature, right? I've been at the other end where I'm the one who doesn't have any feelings. Karma? What comes around, comes back around.

CAN ANYBODY FUCKIN' ACCEPT ME FOR WHO THE FUCK I AM? Please! I wish someone, just anyone, can look ahead from my fuckin' bullshit ex-life, and look at what's currently on progress.

If anybody is out there with an open-mind, scream, and I shall hear you out as best as I can. Come hither. Let the clouds from above send you down to my front door, while the seraphs sing Hallelujah 'til no ends. Blah, blah.

I know people don't really give a flying fuck about my birthday; I don't neither, well kind of. My previous birthdays were so shitty that I just grew indifferent towards celebrating my nonsensical self-holiday. Oh please, spare me the crocodile tears and the pity 'awws' because they are gratuitous. I'm not asking for sympathy. HAHA. I could really care less. I was raised with no money, and was raised to be satisfied with whatever. I can be a brat, yes, but when I know that it's necessary to be quiet, I know my place. The main reasons why I was looking forward to this one is just the fact that I can get tattoos whenever the fuck I want, I can get a job without signing a whole bunch of working papers, the fact that I can go to strip clubs, and can go to 18-to-party-21-to-drink parties/club shit.

Anywho, I've been complaining to various people about my situation. They've done it and said it all, but it's my decision whether to do something about it or not. Eh, I'm still here, aren't I? Lol. I'm just waiting for those days when it'll be all worth it. . . I hope.

BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
If you don't like me,
you can kiss my. . .
(Had to put arrows on it. Lol. Ha, I'm not gon' try and explain this one. Trust me, there are no blandishments involved.)

Ultimately,
QUE SERA, SERA.

6 comments:

  1. Incase you don't see the other comment I wrote on the past blog, it wasn't me who said fuck this blog or whatever haha. I understand how you feel though because I was feeling that a couple of months ago. Anytime I got into an argument with my Ex he would point out everything I had done wrong in the past and I eventually grew sick of it and left. All I got to say it just don't sweat it because we are both young and should just be enjoying life, not stressing over relationships or tiny bullshit.

    You'll get through it, I promise :]

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  2. Oh nah, haha. It was my friend Brian who wrote that. Lol. He told me he was going to write it.

    Yeah, what doesn't kill you make you stronger right? Except drugs, of course.

    And it's not even that. It just sucks at the fact that it's almost my birthday. The coincidence of that, hmm? Lol.

    But, thanks for the support. =]

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  3. I felt this way a couple of months ago. Things going on in my life had me 'bent' or stuck. And if no one can accept you for you, and disregard your past because clearly your present is seeking progression then keep it moving.

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  4. Yeah, understood. But it's just easy to say, but hard to do. There are ALWAYS on and off days.

    As contradictory as this may sound, I'm a pessimist, but currently keeping an optimistic mind. HAHA.

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  5. I know how you feel... To have a birthday come up and know no one really cares... I mean sure, you will have a couple who pretends they do, but all in all you know they don't. I go on just pretending my birthday is just a regular day. At times i can just go thru it without barely anyone knowing... It sucks... And we pretend like we don't care. It's been so long this way that we are just use to it... But somehow there is that emptiness we feel. A breath that seems short and just lingers onto our emotions... Just to be remembered. Just to be really cared for... None of that bullshit or sorriness... The ones who feel bad... Fuck them... We don't want their sympathy... People talk but they don't know... It's just an emptiness... But I rather feel this way that surrounded with fake people... Happy belated birthday... And when my birthday comes ill make sure to remember to give you a toast... you might not hear it, but it'll happen...

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  6. YES, perfect word: EMPTINESS. It sucks. It feels as if you and I don't exist, but to those who are supposed to give acknowledgments.

    Too bad you're an Anonymous commenter... If I knew who you were, I would personally thank you. =]

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Gracias for the input. =P

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