Friday, August 7, 2009

Sucker for Love.

"...You a little sucker for love, right? Word up, hahahahaha."

Yeah, no lie; I am. One of my closest friends said I was just desperate. Haha, nah. Lol. I love the whole idea of relationships. Yes, I know there are ups and downs, and I'm willing to go through it all. I just love holding hands, hugging, and kissing, and all that good stuff. Evidently, with a person whom a really want to be with. I like sitting down, watching TV with an accompaniment of silence, without it being awkward. I love it when somebody thinks about me almost 24/7 without becoming obsessive. I love how the love between each other is mutual. I'm waiting for that somebody who can make me smile like there is no tomorrow. Just that somebody who I can depend on through thick or thin. My cousin told me to just lay low, and just wait. Well, that's what I'm doing, just waiting for my Prince Charming to sweep me off of my feet. Everybody keeps telling me that I'm still young, but I feel like my time is running out. If I'm still single by the time I turn 25, I'm signing myself up for eHarmony, and Match.com. HAHAHA. I'm serious though. My grandma told me that I will probably get a divorce. She said that I'm too bossy. HAHA, nah. My day with my guy will come. =]

Patience is a virtue.

Trust me, I felt pain. The pain that can't be solve by any fuckin' pain meds. It hurt so bad. I didn't know how to make it stop. All I can do was just fucking cry, shrieking with the horrid thought of me and him not being together. I was huddled up on the corner with my knees against my chest. Tears couldn't stop running down my cheeks. I prayed to God for the hurt to stop, but I was just ignored and neglected. I thought that I was about to lose my mind. I could not think at all. All I can do was fuck up. There was no room for light. I just gave up.

Yeah. I fucked up badly.

I have not been out. Last time I went out was two weeks ago. I have not gotten drunk. Last time I got drunk was two weeks ago. I still drink, but the last time I drank was red, red wine. I'm done with all that shit. All the mishaps I got myself into in the past backfired like a bitch. It smacked me hard, and it caught me off guard.

WARNING:
ALCOHOL truly FUCKS people up.
I don't care what anybody says. Stay away from any alcoholic beverages. You know damn well you can't blame everything on the a-a-a-a-a-alcohol. No sir.

I suggest to not consume alcohol around people you barely know. The hormonal and testosterone levels boost up, and shit happens. One day, you'll come across somebody whom you really like, but they can't accept you because of the shit you did while you were intoxicated. Yes, past is past, but people do have standards. Lol.

Love has taught me a lot of shit. It's what I blame for my past. I'm just a sucker for love.

If you really love somebody, be sure you're ready to sacrifice, to forgive, to accept, and to understand.

During summers, most relationships fail due to the superfluous amount of parties. People like to have fun; I understand that. It's just that I don't think people should break hearts just because they want a one night stand. I'm sorry to say this, but a lot of guys break up with their girls because of that shit. It wouldn't be cheating because they broke up right? I mean like come on, that's some fucked up shit. They know that no matter what, the girl will take them back, so they don't even give a fuck if she's crying her heart out. When a girl does that to a guy, every word in the urban dictionary on degrading females will be used. Asap. Yeah, what comes around, come back around though.

"What you won't do, do for love. You tried everything, but you don't give up."

My last relationship flopped. I guess that everything happens for a reason. I'm not giving up though. It just sucks to go through it. The whole process of breaking up sucks balls. WTF?! I keep telling myself that everything happens for a reason, because it does. You'll find out soon. =p

Man, if you've been reading my posts and the comments along with them, you can tell that a lot of people does not really like me. Lol. It's funny how people assume a lot of shit, even if I'm not doing anything at all. First of all, I've been stuck at home since I crashed my car. So, if you're planning on commenting this with nonsense, please shut the fuck up.

Bonus:
My new babies.

25 comments:

  1. So who are you crying about that black kid of that spanish kid before? If it's for the black kid, you fucked up big time. That other guy was much more attentive and loving to you from what I saw on his blog.

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  2. Uhm. My pain and anguish was for my first bf. Lol. After that, I kind of fell back. I didn't care what anybody felt. Well, for the MOST part.

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  3. yea i feel u on that i lost somebody that i thought was going to be there for me always just like i was for her and then i found myself just how you did i felt sad alone and cold and didnt know what to do with my life anymore i gave up on everybody and everything but then my sister told me that same thing your cousin said wait and they will come but i said fuck waiting im impatient lol that and i told her i want her back but i keep finding all the wrong ones and im hopping that i will find the one that can make me have that do anything for feeling again

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  4. Guys are jerks. They're gonna make me become lesbian one day.

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  5. Yeah. There are plenty millions of people out there that has to be destined for somebody. Right?
    My guy is just sifting through, maybe he got lost. Lol.

    Yeahhhhhhhhh, I'm bi. Guys do me wrong? Let the ladies show me what's good. HAHA.

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  6. Mikki this makes me sad for you =( well maybe you should hit Rob back he really loved you. Your in my prayers hope you get your mind right and realized what you did.

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  7. HA. I came into a realization that I AM still young.=]

    Only time can tell.

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  8. I been tellin your ass to lay low like a drive by is comin, just chill a good dude will walk in your life and make you his priority and not his when ever so chill till the next episode chuchhhhhhhh and everybody check out my post its deep like a grave ya digggggggggggggggggggggggggg

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  9. im already here. you lost me. im still around babe. you left me.

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  10. Aw, Cam, thank you. =P

    Wait, who's Mr. Anonymous over here?

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  11. I agree with the Rob comment, I think it's because you go for the same type of guys. Plus I think you had love in your hands and took it for granted maybe you should look in the mirror and see whats really in front of you?

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  12. Well, Rob aggravated a lot of situations that was really gratuitous, so no.

    And, looking at the mirror will just give me a reflection of myself.

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  13. so blame him for what you did to him? So you are mad he put you out there? I don't get that, in any case your little exploits with these black dudes you chase around left you alone.Of course you have a insane amount to replace them. I think It's sad of you say that about him when he was the realest guy I've seen you with. I mean I don't know the whole back story but yeah like the girl up there said. He really did love you and you can't cover that up.

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  14. I don't blame him, reason why I said 'gratuitous'.

    And, seen with me? Hmm. He was never my bf.

    Sorry, but if he loves me then he does. I just don't love him back.

    I'm not trying to cover anything.

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  15. i just think that people need to let u do u. rob is clearly not over you... mind you hes like a decade older than you n he keeps stressin it. i wouldnt be surprised if the anonymous comments, except for this 1, are his. u should continue to live ur life n maybe wit a few tweaks here n there everything will fall into place. good luck

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  16. Aight for those of you here who are anonymous don't care if you a friend of me or hers or readers. You don't need to mention me anymore. Sorry I don't ever hide and if you trying to back me up or some shit, it's not cool. Let this shit be already and move on. Sure you know the blogs the stories and other matters. That doesn't mean you know me or Mikki.

    Only people that know the truth are me and her. Whatever it was behind closed doors. She knows what it is and knows not to open her mouth again or I will show what it was. She can say what she want's freedom of speach. It you eat it up then do so. But I don't hide and you guys on here thinking it's cute bringin me up again. Like i said, don't care if you friend or a reader whos a fan. Just let her be and let her live and learn.

    Peace and Love.

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  17. "Vulkan The Krusader" u constantly talk about her so i dont know how it is that u want others to "let shit be" when u not doing it urself. u need to move on u're almost 30 u should be smarter than that and u shouldn't be stressin the fact that she simply doesnt want u. just let it go, who says that because u wanna put her on the spot light with what u say means its true? like u said no one knows what really happened except for u and her so don't bring up the situation when both of u contradict what the other says. personally i believe her because i can tell ur just mad that she hurt u n thats understandable but u really just need to let her grow up on her own, u have already reached ur late 20s. she'll learn eventually.

    pce

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  18. like I said you dont know me or her your just anonymous.Who saids I want her? I don't shes a horrible person.

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  19. Just because you don't want her, doesn't mean you don't love her.

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  20. Well said, cuz no one does she knows who does.

    that's all I gotta say. She degrades herself everyday even now.

    next lifetime.

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  21. I think I like the fact that I dont read this thing that much because when I do there is SO much material waiting for me.

    Hi Mikki.
    (my name is GLEN by the way)

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  22. Yeah, 'Glen'. Lol.

    How's you and wifey?

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  23. Andizzle from the bottom of the mizzleAugust 15, 2009 at 9:31 AM

    he maddddddd

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Gracias for the input. =P

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